just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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