sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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