there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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