Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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