If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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