Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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