I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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