i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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