Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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