we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
