it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
