Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
My butt remains clenched, sir.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
