i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize