turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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