That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize