before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize