dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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