Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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