The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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