Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
This is my gift to your gina
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
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