I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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