JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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