But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
