I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
