alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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