apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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