you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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