piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
