I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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