i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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