A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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