i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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