she was so not down for the gang bang
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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