love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
