your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
