Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
