When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize