Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
