i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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