remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
