question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
