I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Randomize
