i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I am mentally ready for anal.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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