I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
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