What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
