we're blogging at a bar
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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