She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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