Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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