turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
