I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.